D-Day

We spent the last two nights at our friends Amy & Dennis house. So wonderful that we could stay there. They live down the street and as we sold Eriks car on Thursday, we could walk to our place to pack the last things, clean the house and for a final walk through both with the kids and without. We were able to toast together to the last 4 years and to have a big cry in a very empty house together. Crying about what and who we are gonna leave behind, about the uncertainties on our path but also tears of happiness that we were lucky enough to experience this and to meet so many wonderful people and make such wonderful friends that we call family now.

And then it is Saturday July 3rd 10 am. Our friends Leslie and Beni came by with the kids for a final goodbye, Nynkes friend Julia came by for a final visit and right before they all arrived I felt my back hurting. I wasn't sure what happened, maybe I carried something too heavy, but it started hurting and it got to a point that I could only cry as I couldn't move without a lot of pain anymore. I had tried to put some Biofreeze on it after taking a hot shower, but it got to the point that I literally couldn't bend anymore. And this was about 2 hours before leaving for the airport. To say I was not happy is an understatement. When our friends Alda and Kasey arrived they ran home to get me some tape, Amy gave me some painkillers and then Michelle and Wayne arrived, they would drive us to the airport. I have never been more grateful for Wayne and Michelles truck with heated seating, which made the trip to the airport bearable (painwise).

The goodbye from our friends at Sunflower drive was very hard and we cried for a while in the car. The trip went smoothly and arriving to the airport it was def a bit stressful to get all the suitcases out of the car and into the airport and figuring out where to go, especially as I couldn't do anything. Wayne and Michelle had parked the cars and came to help us, so that was wonderful. We had to get into a line for special luggage as Erik brought his bike on the plane and that took a long time. After that we took some time to eat some delicious Cinnamon rolls that Alda made for us and then we had to say goodbye to Wayne and Michelle, thank goodness this was the last goodbye...this day was not easy saying goodbye to so many wonderful friends.

Customs was still stressful as of course we had to take off our shoes. The taking of part is not hard, but as you have to take of your sweater, shoes, belt, take out all electronics and use about 10-12 different bins for everything takes a bit of time. And then try to put your shoes back on if you can't bend without screaming from pain and while trying to grab all your belongings but not being able to carry any...well, I guess you get the picture. So by the time we got through customs, we were both relieved and all cranky and had to walk very far (good thing that you don't know that before). And then we arrived at the terminal where we would leave from, only to see that the Starbucks (and 70% of the few stores in that terminal) were closed.

We had received a form to fill out that was a print from a copy of a fax that we could barely read anymore (I mean....really????), it was like a declaration of being healthy, but it also required you to add your test results to the form..STRESSS!!! We were told we didn't have to test before flying as the USA had turned yellow to The Netherlands only a week before. It took me about 45 min to an hour to find someone working at Delta that could tell me I only had to fill in one side, not the other. And no test necessary....pfffiew!

About an hour before we would start to board it started to rain. And then after about 15 minutes it started to storm and thunder really hard. Ergo....Nynke started screaming that she wouldn't get on that plane because she didn't want to die. I tried to calm her down while in the meantime I tried to keep myself calm as I was nearly having a panic attack. Of Course I didn't want the kids to notice. It certainly didn't help that all the groundpersonal were called to stop working outside and take shelter inside. Anyway, the storm went by and we boarded as planned. I got an icepack from the nice stewardess who had a terrible accident with her perfume bottle that morning, it must have been a bitter fight as it felt like she was drenched in that perfume:-(.

Anyway, the flight itself went by pretty fast. They did warn us that it would start off quite bumpy and that service would be held off for a while, but eventually it was only about 20 minutes until they started doing their rounds, so not too bad. I was able to sleep about 2 hours orso towards the end of the flight, that was nice. I didn't drink anything because I didn't want to have to go to the bathroom too often because of my back. We arrived about 35 minutes early, which is always great and actually happens a lot on the flight from Boston-Amsterdam is our experience. And when we arrived at customs there was literally only one person in front of us (That was probably also because we stayed in the plane until everyone was out ánd because I walked about as fast as the slowest turtle you've ever met). And then when we got to the baggage claim, our suitcases came out 1,2,3....etc. And also Erik's bike was there already, so we didn't have to wait for anything.

When we got out Eriks parents were waiting for us. (In Amsterdam there are still no visitors allowed in the airport, only officially one at a time). It was so nice to finally see them again after 2 years. They helped us to the taxi that we rented and then would come to our house in Amersfoort to meet us there. Pim had not slept at all in the plane and as soon as the taxi driver hit the gas, Pim was out. By the time we pulled into our street we woke Pim up, all our parents, sisters and their families and two of our friends were waiting for us. Everything was decorated in our street and when Pim saw this he said: "Mom, I can't have a party now, I am to tired I need to sleep:-)". Of Course when we got out and after we greeted everyone, the adrenaline took over and Pim did great. His cousins and his best friend were there and he loved it all. The weather was beautiful, my friend Elke brought my favorite cake and after greeting everyone Erik, the kids and I took a stroll through our house while everyone else stayed outside and had some coffee and cake. It was so weird to walk around the house that we spent so many years in before leaving to America and to see that everything was pretty much the same as how we left it. Some things were broken, other things worn out, but everything was the same. There were so many flowers which was so wonderful, there were many cards and my mom and Eriks mom had done a great job making it look great. The fridge was stocked, we had everything we needed. And from our family we got this cool basket with presents in it for all of us to open everyday for a week and another big box of welcome presents from Joyce and her family, put together by the kids. My sister and niece had made picture frames for the kids and had put that in their rooms and our beds were made and there were cards and some licorice under the pillows from our moms. So many fun surprises that went on the whole week. People stopping by to bring us flowers from their own garden, other bouquets delivered to our house, a neighbor who brought a beautiful houseplant and just so many people in the neighborhood that welcomed us back. It really was a warm welcome.

In the meantime though my back only got worse, and that was no fun. Because who would unpack the suitcases? We found a way and Nynke was a huge help with this. I couldn't have done it without her. It was a lot of work and where I would normally have it done by the evening, it now took 2-3 days, but that was fine too.

We can definitely say it was a journey, the past two months. But it was a wonderful journey, no matter how painful it was at times. We really are overwhelmed by the love we have felt from everyone in Raynham and also here in Holland upon arrival. We are at day 10 of being back now and are still overwhelmed by all the emotions. We are taking it one day at a time and will get there. I will write more about all the things we have done in the past 10 days here (I mostly observed everything from the couch, but still...) So more to come soon, but as it is 11:25 pm already here, and Pim has school tomorrow, I really need to get ready for bed.

To be continued! -XO-

And here we are...

What a rollercoaster were the last 6 weeks. At the moment that I am writing this, it is 6 weeks ago that I wrote my last blog. At that point we still had time, and we still had our vacation in the Berkshires ahead of us. And little did we know how much wonderful things were planned for us as good bye.

BERKSHIRES We went to the Berkshires in the Memorial Day weekend. All our friends in Massachusetts don’t need any explanation about how that was. It was a very cold, rainy and yuckie week unfortunately. We were kind of stressed with everything going on and it is honest to say that the first two days did not turn out the best. Unhappy kids, unhappy parents, add a big amount of stress and exhaustion and some moving to the other side of the world stress and it was not all that fun. Thank goodness we were able to turn it around and we Kayaked, Fished and played boardgames and everything together turned out to be great.

FRIENDS GOODBYE About 6 months ago, one of my friends told me that she and 4 other friends wanted to make everything a bit easier for us during the move and they asked us if they could plan our goodbye. For those that know me well enough: that was very stressful, giving that out of my hands. But it was wonderful that they wanted to do it so we agreed and we only got some dates, the rest was a surprise. On June 13th we had to come to another friends house where all our close friends were with their families. They had a waterslide bouncy, a jumpy house, the food was incredible from Beni at Grand Slam and they all had the red/white and blue theme and even got us all a shirt to match the theme. It was so wonderful what they had all done. During the day we received a photo album with not just pictures, but so many people had send in pictures and letters for and about us all. The work that was put into that book was absolutely incredible. All the kids teachers had written something for them, staff I worked with and parents I have worked with over the years, and our friends that were all there that day had one or two pages as well. I can tell you that I shed lots of tears that day. Oh….and I haven’t even mentioned the amazing cake with both the American and the Dutch Flag on it made by Alda. AMAZING!!! What a day!!!!

LIMO A week later, Monday afternoon, I’m receiving a text from Alda that she is picking me and Amy up at 4:30 pm. A few days before that, they started to stress me out (while having a lot of fun together) about what I should wear. Can I just say that all of our stuff had literally just shipped the day before?! So no high heels or fancy clothes around. Anyway….they pick me up and bring me somewhere, blindfolded. While there they kept me blindfolded until they realized that that “one” friend that they were waiting for, was gonna be about 15 more minutes. Of course Im thinking by myself who that can be and then all of a sudden a limo drives up lol. As I’ve never been in a limo, that was exciting by itself.

We drove to Plymouth and had dinner at Eastbay Grill. If I’m saying limo, drinks and 10 crazy moms I don’t think I have to explain anything else then that I had a very very fun night. What a super surprise was that night and it just was so so so much fun!!!! These girls can party!!!

RAVE AWARD

June 22nd we had the annual RAVE meeting. It would be my last one so, even though it was the night after the Limo-date, I made every effort to be there so I could say goodbye to everyone. During the meeting they suddenly told me that I was the recipient of the RAVE award for exceptional dedication and commitment to the children of Raynham. I received a beautiful plack with that on it. I was very surprised and honored!

PARADE And then Sunday June 27th came. This one I was in on as they asked me if I wanted to be surprised or if I would want to help with reaching people. As most of my friends have 3rd graders they know most of the people Pim is friends with, there are not very much families I know from Nynkes grade and my friends practically know none. So I was glad they asked and kept it a secret for the kids. We had to arrive at LaLiberte School at 5 pm and they had decorated it all, it looked amazing. And then there came the cars. It was incredible how many there were already. And then to think that there would’ve been so much more if the local Dance studio hadn’t had their annual recital. So many people reached out that they were bummed they couldn’t have been there. But it was amazing the way it was. Lots of people drove by and a few drove around and parked their car to say a goodbye in person. How lucky we feel that that is possible now after the 1,5 years we have had. It was wonderful to see everyone, but also very sad. One of my best friends I would not see anymore, that made us both so very sad☹. And the kids too, it broke my heart. At the end we received a wonderful painting made by my friend Michelle who is a wonderful artist and it is a Rainbow with the saying on it: Don’t cry because its over, smile because it happened. Above the rainbow there were all raindrops made from all the fingerprints from everyone that joined the parade. What a beautiful gift! The tears didn’t stop coming. Thank you, thank you, thank you again to my wonderful friends that made us feel so incredibly special and loved. And a big thank you as well to all the people that came out to send us off.

SUNFLOWER DRIVE Our fantastic neighbors Sandy and Nora gave a pizzaparty for us as well. All the neighbors from our street were there and it was so nice. The had these cool cupcakes with We will miss you written on it and the next day we received a photoalbum with all pictures from that night, how great was that. We have been so incredibly lucky to be in that neighborhood. Our neighbors have become our friends, and they treated Pim and Nynke as if they were their own. Every holiday they thought about them and we will miss them so much!

GOODBYE’s So many difficult moments we have had, but also such beautiful ones. The last goodbyes with friends were so hard, but we feel so so lucky that we were able to have those goodbyes. Afterall a few months ago, this wouldn’t have been possible at all. So we have just tried to enjoy all the goodbyes. The sleepovers that the kids had, the dinner- and lunchdates I have had with friends and even with my one of my friends father who is very special to me, was just so wonderful. I was able to spend quality time with many. Towards the end it became harder and harder as time was running out. But I think we did good in general and were just so very lucky with the moments we did have.

The goodbyes I had with my closest friends I can’t get into further right now, I’m afraid I won’t be able to sleep anymore then as thinking of it makes me very sad. But I will get into that a little later maybe.

I will also write more about our trip back here, but so many people have reached out to me about everything and I just wanted to drop a little note here so at least everyone knows I’m still alive and kicking and we are all doing as well as can be considering the circumstances. But at this point it is time to head upstairs. Crazy to have the timetable turned now and realizing that it is 6 hours less for you instead of 6 ahead like we are from you now😊.

TO BE CONTINUED…

5.5 weeks left

3 weeks from today the moving company will be on our doorsteps. We have been quite busy the past few weeks trying to put together and set aside everything we want to bring to Holland. It would've been nice if we could just say: "just pack up our house" and than were done. But, as we still have our house in Holland which is fully furnished, that wouldn't make any sense. So that means that we have to make lots of decisions.

*Are we bringing it or not?

*If we are not: are we selling/donating/throwing out?

*If we are: what will go on the boat, and what will go in the suitcases in the plane?

And then lets hope that we don't forget to put things on the boat what doesn't fit in the suitcases. Not the easiest process. It does clean up nicely though, I mean....I think there are lots of people our age and with kids the same age as ours, who would love to get rid of all the baby/little kids stuff, and we did that twice now so there is not a lot left. I kind of look forward to live in a house without so many toys that we could start our own daycare center or toys tore. And as Nynke will turn 12 right after summer and will be going into Dutch Highschool, I'm pretty sure that the babydolls, barbies, cars and other kids stuff is behind us.

I'm looking forward to that new fase in our life. Having our oldest kid go to Dutch Highschool. I'm looking forward to see where she is headed, the choices she is going to make, getting to see the beautiful girl she is growing into. But I'm also dreading it, as we've seen some teenage behavior in Nynke already that will most likely only be enlarged when at that new school and around kids her age. But...as we've done with so many things in life already, we will just dive right in and see what life brings us.

The flight to Amsterdam is only 5 weeks and 2 days away and it is crazy to think about that. Erik and I have many conversations about it and we have a hard time wrapping our heads around it all. Beside the fact that it is so weird to think that I won't be driving to school on the road I can probably drive with my eyes closed. And it is hard to imagine how our life will be when back in Holland. That must sound so weird for many of you as we will be going back to the life we had before. But things will be different, and more importantly, we are different! I'm hoping to take you all on that journey as well when we get back. About how it feels, but be preperared as it will be the good, the bad and the ugly, like you have gotten to know me. I don't fake it till I make it. I wish I could, but I can't.

This Monday was a bad bad day, on Sunday we did a big chunk of work packing while the kids had playdates elsewhere. It didn't help that it was over 90 F out, but we worked hard and I got some peace of mind at night seeing that we got so much done. The next day I woke up in a bad place, I can't even describe it. I started crying and I practically didn't stop until the next day. I was able to pull myself together for pick up duty at school, but I had to cancel my lunch duty and for those that know me well enough, I don't cancel on anything, especially not my responsibilities at work. But I didn't think that walking around those kids with puffy eyes, not being able to stop crying would benefit anyone. I mean: who would want to have that as a side dish at lunch right!?

Tuesday was also not great, but better then Monday. And today I was back. I didn't have my car for two days as the latch from my back door broke, so I couldn't go anywhere. This made time for me to do some arts and crafts for our good bye. This is stuff I like to do, I put some music on and can work for hours on end. I finished lots of projects and even all the end of year goodie bags for the kids teachers are ready. I'm prepared for the last good bye party for the kids and I sort of have the chaos in the house under control.

Before we are leaving we have a little vacation planned, which I cannot wait for to start! We can use a little time away from all the mess in the house and a little chill time before the chaos starts. Because I'm sure the rollercoaster ride we are in doesn't have a long line, so we will be taking several rides the coming weeks.

I have already taken a few rides with some friends, going out to dinner and to lunch, but those rides were the easy going ones, the ones that make me smile and that do make me want to take them again. Unfortunately that most likely won't happen as time is running out. The closer the rides get, the harder they will be as we have already started to say good bye to some people we won't be seeing anymore.

There is one quote from Dr. Seuss that sticks with me since a while now and I'm gonna keep using it as I love it and I want to follow this great advice! -XO-