5.5 weeks left

3 weeks from today the moving company will be on our doorsteps. We have been quite busy the past few weeks trying to put together and set aside everything we want to bring to Holland. It would've been nice if we could just say: "just pack up our house" and than were done. But, as we still have our house in Holland which is fully furnished, that wouldn't make any sense. So that means that we have to make lots of decisions.

*Are we bringing it or not?

*If we are not: are we selling/donating/throwing out?

*If we are: what will go on the boat, and what will go in the suitcases in the plane?

And then lets hope that we don't forget to put things on the boat what doesn't fit in the suitcases. Not the easiest process. It does clean up nicely though, I mean....I think there are lots of people our age and with kids the same age as ours, who would love to get rid of all the baby/little kids stuff, and we did that twice now so there is not a lot left. I kind of look forward to live in a house without so many toys that we could start our own daycare center or toys tore. And as Nynke will turn 12 right after summer and will be going into Dutch Highschool, I'm pretty sure that the babydolls, barbies, cars and other kids stuff is behind us.

I'm looking forward to that new fase in our life. Having our oldest kid go to Dutch Highschool. I'm looking forward to see where she is headed, the choices she is going to make, getting to see the beautiful girl she is growing into. But I'm also dreading it, as we've seen some teenage behavior in Nynke already that will most likely only be enlarged when at that new school and around kids her age. But...as we've done with so many things in life already, we will just dive right in and see what life brings us.

The flight to Amsterdam is only 5 weeks and 2 days away and it is crazy to think about that. Erik and I have many conversations about it and we have a hard time wrapping our heads around it all. Beside the fact that it is so weird to think that I won't be driving to school on the road I can probably drive with my eyes closed. And it is hard to imagine how our life will be when back in Holland. That must sound so weird for many of you as we will be going back to the life we had before. But things will be different, and more importantly, we are different! I'm hoping to take you all on that journey as well when we get back. About how it feels, but be preperared as it will be the good, the bad and the ugly, like you have gotten to know me. I don't fake it till I make it. I wish I could, but I can't.

This Monday was a bad bad day, on Sunday we did a big chunk of work packing while the kids had playdates elsewhere. It didn't help that it was over 90 F out, but we worked hard and I got some peace of mind at night seeing that we got so much done. The next day I woke up in a bad place, I can't even describe it. I started crying and I practically didn't stop until the next day. I was able to pull myself together for pick up duty at school, but I had to cancel my lunch duty and for those that know me well enough, I don't cancel on anything, especially not my responsibilities at work. But I didn't think that walking around those kids with puffy eyes, not being able to stop crying would benefit anyone. I mean: who would want to have that as a side dish at lunch right!?

Tuesday was also not great, but better then Monday. And today I was back. I didn't have my car for two days as the latch from my back door broke, so I couldn't go anywhere. This made time for me to do some arts and crafts for our good bye. This is stuff I like to do, I put some music on and can work for hours on end. I finished lots of projects and even all the end of year goodie bags for the kids teachers are ready. I'm prepared for the last good bye party for the kids and I sort of have the chaos in the house under control.

Before we are leaving we have a little vacation planned, which I cannot wait for to start! We can use a little time away from all the mess in the house and a little chill time before the chaos starts. Because I'm sure the rollercoaster ride we are in doesn't have a long line, so we will be taking several rides the coming weeks.

I have already taken a few rides with some friends, going out to dinner and to lunch, but those rides were the easy going ones, the ones that make me smile and that do make me want to take them again. Unfortunately that most likely won't happen as time is running out. The closer the rides get, the harder they will be as we have already started to say good bye to some people we won't be seeing anymore.

There is one quote from Dr. Seuss that sticks with me since a while now and I'm gonna keep using it as I love it and I want to follow this great advice! -XO-